Direction matters: in or out, to me or away
Japanese splits English 'give' into two verbs depending on who's on the receiving end. あげる = (I/we/someone) give to someone outside the inner circle (away from me / my side). くれる = (someone outside) gives to me / to my inner circle (toward me). もらう = (I/we) receive from someone. The trick isn't the verbs themselves — it's keeping track of who's the inner circle. We'll then see how each pairs with 〜て: 〜て あげる ('do for someone'), 〜て くれる ('someone does for me'), 〜て もらう ('have someone do for me / receive an action').
あげる — I/we give to someone (outward)
A は B に X を あげる = 'A gives X to B.' Use あげる when the giver is the one closer to the speaker (often the speaker themselves), and the receiver is more distant. 私 は アナさん に 本 を あげました。 = 'I gave Anna a book.' ケンさん は せんせい に 花 を あげました。 = 'Ken gave the teacher flowers.' (Speaker is reporting; Ken is on the speaker's side, the teacher is the recipient.) あげる never works when the receiver is the speaker — for that, use くれる.
くれる — someone gives to me / my side (inward)
A は (私 に) X を くれる = 'A gives X to me.' Use くれる when the receiver is the speaker (or someone in the speaker's inner circle — family, close friends). The に-marked recipient is often dropped because it's obvious it's 'me'. アナさん は 私 に 本 を くれました。 = 'Anna gave me a book.' / アナさん は 本 を くれました。 = same, 私 に dropped. ともだち は 妹 に プレゼント を くれました。 = 'My friend gave my (younger) sister a present.' (Sister is in speaker's inner circle, so still くれる.)
もらう — I receive from someone
A は B に / から X を もらう = 'A receives X from B.' Same situation as くれる but framed from the receiver's point of view. 私 は アナさん に 本 を もらいました。 = 'I received a book from Anna.' / アナさん は 本 を くれました。 = 'Anna gave me a book.' Same event, two angles. に or から mark the giver (use から when the giver is an institution: 会社 から 手紙 を もらいました。 = 'I got a letter from the company.').
Inner circle vs. outer circle
The key concept is うち / そと ('in / out'). Your inner circle is you + family + close friends + your company (when speaking to someone outside it). Your outer circle is everyone else — strangers, acquaintances, the listener (in many contexts). あげる = giving from in-circle out, or between two outsiders. くれる = an outsider giving to in-circle. So: 'My boss gave my friend a gift' uses あげる (boss → friend, both seen externally). 'My boss gave my brother a gift' uses くれる (brother is in-circle). The recipient's distance from you is what decides.
〜て あげる, 〜て くれる, 〜て もらう — favors
Glue any of the three verbs onto a て-form and you get 'doing something for someone'. 〜て あげる = 'do (favor) for someone (out-circle)': アナさん に 日本語 を おしえて あげました。 = 'I taught Anna Japanese.' (Use carefully — sounds slightly patronizing in some contexts; in casual speech with friends it's fine.) 〜て くれる = 'someone (out-circle) does (favor) for me / in-circle': アナさん は 日本語 を おしえて くれました。 = 'Anna taught me Japanese.' (often grateful tone) 〜て もらう = 'have someone do for me / receive an action': 私 は アナさん に 日本語 を おしえて もらいました。 = 'I had Anna teach me Japanese.'
くれる vs. もらう — same favor, different angle
アナさん は 私 に 日本語 を おしえて くれました。 = 'Anna taught me Japanese.' (subject = giver = Anna) 私 は アナさん に 日本語 を おしえて もらいました。 = 'I had Anna teach me Japanese.' / 'I got Anna to teach me Japanese.' (subject = receiver = me) Same event. 〜て くれる focuses on the giver's kindness. 〜て もらう focuses on the speaker actively benefiting / arranging it. Both are extremely common; pick whichever angle you're emphasizing.
Politeness ladder (preview)
All three have politer versions: あげる → さしあげる (give to someone above me, very humble). くれる → くださる (someone above gives to me — its ます form is the irregular くださいます). もらう → いただく (humbly receive). You've already seen ください (from くださる) every time you said 〜て ください. We'll do the rest in lesson 30 (keigo). For now, あげる / くれる / もらう cover everyday speech.
